written by Smiley at the Mobius Forum
Alright... so this is a musical fanfic, I guess... It's not much... okay, I poured a LOT into the song part, so you better read it! I think it's really good! And, like many a fanfic, the song comes out of nowhere. The singers are noted thusly:
(L) = Locke
(K) = Knuckles
(Sp) = Spectre
(S) = Sonic
(T) = Tikal
(R) = Robotnik
(Sm) = Smiley (Sorry! Read the post-script...)
(F) = Female Chorus (either Julie-Su, Sally and Amy or Chainspike, Mary and True Red - I wasn't sure they'd be able to finish the entire song without attacking Knuckles)
[Int: Station Square Hotel]
(Knuckles has just finished off Chaos 2, and now turns his focus to Robotnik...)
Knuckles: You look different... are you really Robotnik?
Robotnik: Yep.
K: The same Robotnik that has lied to me on countless occasions?
R: Yep.
K: The same Robotnik who constantly schemes to steal the Master Emerald so you can use it to further your evil?
R: Yep.
K: The same Robotnik who JUST blew up the Master Emerald two days ago?
R: Yep.
K: The same Robotnik who JUST tried to kill me five seconds ago?
R: Yep.
K: The same Robotnik who, time and time again, has forced me to rely on Sonic's unending friendship, which endures no matter what hardships I put him through, to defend my home and this world?
R: Yep. Speaking of Sonic, he's gathering the Master Emerald shards for reasons I won't go into now.
K: I KNEW IT! I'M GOING TO GO CREAM THAT LITTLE WORM! Oh, and remind me to give you a harsh talking to once you are no longer isolated from your protective devices.
R: Yeah, sure thing. Have fun! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
K: Uh, yeah... (...he's such a weirdo...)
(Knuckles runs off)
[Int. Monitering Station]
(Locke and Spectre are watching the above sequence on a video screen)
Spectre: ....and HE'S supposed to be our savior?
Locke: LOOK OUT! Incoming musical number!
(a microphone flies out of nowhere and lands in Locke's hands)
To the tune of:
Pretty Fly (for a Rabbi) by Weird Al Yankovich
Which is a parody of:
Pretty Fly (for a White Guy) by Offspring
K: All alone on this floating island...
[music starts]
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
And all the furries say I'm pretty keen
(F: for a monotreme!)
K: I'm the last of my race, what am I doing in this place?
L: Our island's had a fair share, of guardians in the past,
but most of them were weirdos (Sp: hey!), L: and none of them were fast.
But our new guy is something, he's strong and he's slick,
I tell ya he's the savior, he punched out Super Sonic!
He's one cool guy, he doesn't even try,
But no one can seem to figure out he can fly.
Punchin' left and right, never lacking fight,
K: "Ya talking to me?" "Ya talking to me?"
L: If you touch his stuff, he'll have to get rough,
If you think I've lied just wait until you've seen him glide...
So grab your padded gloves and
Hey! Hey! Do that Echidna thing!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
Where to now, Tikal? T: This way! This way!
K: And all the furries say I'm pretty keen
F: (for a monotreme!)
L: He started as a loner, but this way he would not stay.
He now has found his people, at least if Archie has their way.
He's finally found his family, he's started to take root,
He's discovered his lost father and cult of sorts to boot!
People used to moan, Knux set an awful tone,
Punching buttons and following Robotnik's lieing drone.
But he went from tool, to way past cool,
On that faithful day! We got S and K!
His game was lots of fun, now he's number one!
And no one seems to care that his name is just a pun...
So grab your Lego shoes and
Hey! Hey! What's a monotreme?
He's not good friends with Sonic, and this is widely known.
But he'll do whatever it takes to protect his home.
In speed he is no contest, his attitude is met,
But when it comes to fangirls, Knux has him beat no sweat!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
F: How ya doing Knuckles? K: Okay! Okay!
S: Whatcha doing Knucklehead? K: Hey-hey! Hey-hey!
K: I'm the last of my race, what am I doing in this place?
Sm: So come on one and all, grab up your Knuckles doll,
And answer to the Forum's Knuckles-Lovers club role call!
Is there one out there, who will deny his hair?
Do you dare? Do you dare?
I've had a lot of fun, at seeing what was done,
But I can't believe the Knuckles Marathon has just begun!
So grab your colored socks...
And tie your hair into dreadlocks!
Let's put on our colored socks and
Hey! Hey! Do that Knuckles thing!
Spectre: Well... that was... interesting.
Locke: Uhh, yeah.
Spectre: ....
Locke: ....you sure you're an Echidna under all that smoke?
Spectre: Yep. Would I lie to you?
-FIN-
(because SA is such a work of art, it needs a French word to end it)
Two closing notes:
1) I'm sorry I inserted myself into the song. I couldn't figure out a way around it. It wouldn't make any sense for Locke to compliment the Forum's design, would it? Write your own ending if you like - I had run out of rhymes by that point...
2) For "Okay!" and "This way!", think of it exactly like they say it in SA.
...Oh my god, that almost fits into the song's beat. And it rhymes too. I honestly didn't mean to write it like that. I spent way too much time on this song.
I hope you liked it! Feel free to rate it and please, be brutal.
-Smiley
True Red note: Just to explain part of the ending, this was written during the huge Knuckles celebration in February 2000 at the Mobius Forum (Sonic HQ's message board) for Knuckles' 6th anniversary.